Another Scrap from the Chopping Block

The Song Remains the Same

Lotus Flower

The editing process is crucial. There are scenes that can weaken the impact of a story, and therefore must be removed to help the story flow. This is such a scene. While I loved this moment between Phil and Kenna after their initial reunion at the end of The Song Remains the Same, I felt that it didn’t particularly contribute to the ending in any significant way. I think that I was so reluctant to let them go, that I kept on writing, not ready for the end myself.

It all started with that kiss…


But for those of you who may have wondered what happened between their reunion and the surprise of Phil’s life for an epilogue, here’s a little more bittersweet symphony to melt your hearts. And sex, because it’s Phil fucking Deveraux and Kenna.

Unedited, deleted scene from The Song Remains the Same.

                Phil got back up on stage, and NOLA’s Own said their “thank-you’s” and bowed, Phil giving a heart-felt Namaste. Then I raced around to meet him backstage to have him crush me in his arms, his mouth fused with mine. My senses filled with him: his scent, his feel, his taste.

              “Take me home,” I breathed against his mouth.

                He growled at me, sending thick, hot, throbbing sensations through me.

                We left through the side entrance, not saying a damn thing to anyone. Pulling me along by my hand, he led me to the Black Beauty, opened the driver’s side, and shoved me in. Phil threw himself behind the wheel and shoved his key into the ignition.

                “Dude, don’t kill us!” I snapped as he peeled out of the parking lot, his hand squeezing my crotch, and his eyes on me.

                “I can’t fuckin’ think straight!” he barked.

                Flying past the Plantation House, the Black Beauty squealed as he took the corner and drove her to my place.

                “Why here?” I asked as he dragged me out of the truck.

                “We promised each other we’d go back to the beginning.”

                Using his key, he unlocked the front door, and before I knew it, we were up in my room. Slamming the bedroom door behind him, he pulled me into his arms and I turned to putty.

                “Oh, god, I fuckin’ missed you,” he moaned in between raining kisses all over my face and neck. “That fuckin’ sucked, Kenna. I never want to go through that again.”

                “Me neither,” I panted.

                His hands went to my T-shirt, about to tear it off me.

                “Wait!” I cried.

                “WHAT?!” he roared.

                Stepping back, I could see he looked ready to have a seizure. “I got a new tattoo,” I told him.

                “Okay,” he replied, not giving a flying fuck at this point.

                “It’s…it’s big.”

                “How big?”

                “Well…” I grabbed the hem of my shirt and then just wrenched it over my head. I was wearing a sheer black bra that hid nothing.

                Phil’s eyes grew enormous. “Baby Girrrl…” his voice rumbled.

                Reaching out his hand, his fingertips gently traced over the anatomical heart tattooed over my actual heart, with the name Phil looking as though it had been branded onto it.

                “I’m just as mad as you are.” I smiled.

                “Fuck…” he swallowed hard. “Who did it?”

                “Who else?”

                “It’s fuckin’ amazin’, Kenna.”

                “You like it?”

                “I love it. I love you.”

                He was giving me that burning look that I had terribly missed. The one that showed me just how raw and vulnerable I made him, how much he adored what he saw when he looked at me.

                “I love you, too,” I told him.

                Then we were tearing at each other’s clothes, simply dying to feel our flesh pressing together.

                “I ain’t gonna last long,” he predicted.

                “You might when you get a whiff of me. I haven’t showered in over thirty-six hours.”

                “Fuck, I need to be in you,” he groaned, releasing his hold on me.

                Stripping off my jeans and underwear, I sprinted into the bathroom with him close on my heels. I turned on the shower and hopped in, scrubbing everything all at once.

                Grabbing my wrists, he pushed me up against the wall, holding my arms above my head, “Slow down, Kenna Baby.”

                “I’m just…”

                “I know. Me, too.”

                “I’ve felt so hollow without you, babe. It hurts…”

                Groaning deep and sexy in his chest, he pinned me with his body and slammed his mouth on mine. Pure fucking heaven. He tasted so wonderful. I never wanted it to end. His lips were the most incredibly soft, warm, deliciously sweet things I’d ever tasted. His tongue played with mine in the most sensuous caresses. It seemed as though he was just as enchanted with my flavor as I was with his.

                Breaking the kiss, he pulled his head back, pressing his Third Eye to mine. “I ain’t fuckin’ you in the shower. We gotta move this along.”

                While we washed ourselves as quickly as we could, I did take the time to admire him. He wasn’t as built as he had been. He was leaner, more cut. He didn’t look smaller really—he was still larger than life. But he was even more beautiful. Hardened, and polished.

                Blinking, I muttered, “Damn, Phil.”

                His head snapped up to look at me. “What?”

                “You’re so fucking gorgeous it’s painful to look at you.”

                He smiled the Lady Killer—and I burst into tears.

                “Hey, what the—” Wrapping his arms around me, he enfolded me, squeezing me tight. “What is it?”

                “I j-just m-missed you so much!” I wailed. “And I come back, and you’re so beautiful, that I can hardly believe it’s real! It’s not j-just what you look like—you look fucking phenomenal—b-but…”

                His fingers stroked through the wet strands of my hair. “I was thinkin’ the same damn thing about you, Kenna. You take my breath away. You brought all the colors back into my world, and I ain’t ever lettin’ you out of my sight again.”

                Sniffling, I said, “Well, that’s a little extreme.”

                He sighed. “Fuck, it’s good to be home.”

                Much more sedate, we dried each other off, allowing ourselves the pleasure of touching and caressing one another. His cock was stupid-hard and freaking ginormous. Oddly enough, I had forgotten how huge he was.

                I hung up my towel, about to head out of the bathroom, when he cleared his throat. I turned to look back at him.

                “Should, um…should we be usin’ condoms or somethin’?”

                I shook my head. “I got back on the shot as soon as I could.”

                Looking down at a spot by my leg, he nodded. “Okay.”

                I knew he wanted to talk about it, but I wasn’t in the mood to kill this mood just yet. “I promise we’ll talk about it soon. In a little while.”

                “All right.”

                The atmosphere shifted. What was once frenzied and desperate had thickened into a powerful need simply to connect. His fingertips skimmed down my spine as I stood next to the bed, shivering goosebumps along my skin. The wall of warmth that was Phil pulsed on my back, stronger the closer he moved toward me. He was radiating love and adoration, all of it directed at me. It made my knees tremble, and they nearly buckled as his lips pressed to my shoulder.

                “Kenna…” he breathed.


                Crawling to the center of the bed, I hadn’t even flipped over completely before he was on me, pressing me back into the mattress, his hands and lips and tongue all over. Starting with my mouth, he kissed, licked, and nipped his way down my neck, to each breast and the blazing tattoo, where he lavished particular attention before going further down.

                “Oh God…” I moaned.

                Phil’s warm breath caressed over my most sensitive skin, and he rubbed his bushy beard on the inside of my thigh. “I’m so fuckin’ hungry for you, Baby Girl. I used to dream about the moment I got to taste you again.” He punctuated his words with a long, fat lick from my hole to my clit, over the lips, too. “And fuck me, you taste sweet.”


                “Mmm…” He went for another taste. “I might come from eatin’ you raw, Baby Girl.”

                He was going to make me come from his fucking filthy language. Attacking me with his mouth, he licked and sucked for only a few heartbeats before I was peaking, arching up to meet his tongue, and sobbing his name.

                “Damn, that was quick.” He laughed. “I fuckin’ wanted more than that, Kenna.”

                “Please, please, Phil…I need you inside me now.” Scooting me up on the bed, he pulled me into his arms, making me straddle his waist. It took me a second, but I noticed he was sitting in a half Lotus Pose. Breathless, I gave him a stunned look. “Wow.”

                He bit his lip as he grasped his cock and slid it through the slippery seam of my crotch. Poised at my entrance, he pulled me in closer with his other arm.

                “I live for you, Kenna,” he whispered. “I tried to do all of this the way you wanted me to. I know I did it for myself, but I did it for you, too, because I’m not whole if I’m not with you.”

Young couple of lovers kissing on black background

                The tip of him pushed in, and it was a little like the first time. A slight sting, a glorious burn, letting me know that I was his and his alone.

                “Fuck,” he breathed. “You’re so tight.”

                “It’s been a while.” I gave him a shy smile.

                “Too fuckin’ right it has. Too fuckin’ long.”

                Slowly, we eased into one another until there was no room left. My legs wrapped around him, my arms around his shoulders, and we gazed into each other’s eyes. His hands came up and framed my face.

                “My beautiful Baby Girl…where’d your hair go?”

                “Do you hate it?”

                “No. You look sexy as hell. It’s just such a shock, I guess.”

                “They had to chop it off to be able to clean it and stitch it up.”

His eyes closed, heaving a sigh.

                “What about your hair?” I asked.

                “I needed to let go. Jason’s Granny told him her spirit guides told her that I needed to get rid of it to help show me who I was. We burned it in a hibachi.”

                “You look beautiful,” I told him.

                His fingers speared around to the back of my head, searching for the scar. “Is that it, then?”

                “Yeah. You can’t see it. Not that it would bother me—”

                “I’m so sorry, Kenna.”

                “It was an accident.”

                “You’ve been hurt so much…”

                “It’s more painful without you, I promise.”

                Inside me, he twitched, kicking into his magic spot. We both sucked in a breath.

                “When did you get the tattoo?” he asked.

                “About three weeks ago. It’s your birthday present.”

                He smiled. “Best fuckin’ birthday present.”

                Hands sliding down my back, Phil cupped my rear, lifting me, then settling me back down. Again. Then again.

                “You’re heaven,” he whispered. “My own private paradise.”

                Rocking back and forth, I held his gaze. I can’t believe there was a time when I could hardly look into his eyes. He had overwhelmed me, scared me even. But not anymore. I’m not afraid of who he is, or what he feels. He’s inside me, too. Those feelings, that intensity—it’s in my heart forever.

                “What do you see?” he asked.

                “I see you. And you’re the most amazing soul I’ve ever laid eyes on. Warm, loving, generous…the fires inside you, they’re burning slower, controlled…it’s so beautiful. You’re so beautiful, Phil.”

                Cradling my head once more, his mouth firmly, but sweetly, possessed mine. Within just a few beats, our passion surged into the inferno that would forever rise within us for each other. Soon we were straining, attempting to fuse ourselves together.

                The energy shifted once again, and suddenly we were on a frequency that we had never touched upon before. Tantric. The feel, the sight, the scent, the energy within us focused on each other. Slowly we pulsed, amazed by the level of love we had for one another. It was tangible on all planes of existence.


                When I came, he was right there with me, our eyes locked on each other, our hearts beating in sync. Two hearts, two minds, one soul reunited.

                “Oh, God…” he whispered. Deep inside, he was still twitching.

                “Something like that,” I agreed.

                “What was that?”

                “Affirmation,” I replied.

                Nodding, he closed his eyes and breathed deeply. “Baby…I need to know…”

                I sighed, releasing the pain and heartache I had faced. “I forgot to take my shot. It was so irresponsible of me—”

                “Baby, it was an accident. You were overworked and exhausted for months by that point.”

                “I think I got pregnant a few days before you left. I figured it out the day Alys and I flew out to meet you. I hadn’t taken a test or anything, so I didn’t want to tell you and be mistaken or something. By the time I took the test, you were so ill and I didn’t think you needed another thing to worry about. Besides, I felt…I knew something wasn’t right. I don’t know how, I just did. And when I got it checked out, the heartbeat was very weak and didn’t beat correctly.”

                Phil pulled me into a vise-like hold and buried his head in my neck.

                “I knew I couldn’t tell you, because I couldn’t give you what you wanted. I was told I should abort it, but I couldn’t do that either. I loved it. It was a part of you.”

                He held me tighter, his breath coming out in a hot sob against my skin.

                “I thought it would be too much for you all at once. If X hadn’t just…I’m sure I would have told you. I just didn’t want you to have to suffer more.”

                “I get that. But the thought of you sufferin’ on your own kills me,” he rasped.

                Taking my face in his hands once more, he sat up to look into my eyes. His own were glistening and wet, his thick, black lashes spiked with his tears.

                “Phil, I would suffer through anything to save you from hurting. Don’t you know that?”

                Laying me gently onto my back, he settled above me, pushing deeper into me. “I would do the same for you. And…”

                “And what?”

                “I love that you named her,” he whispered, kissing me. “I love that she had your secret name. I just wish I had been the one to hold you while…” He swallowed thickly. Pulling out, he smoothly slid back in.

                We didn’t speak for a long time after that. There was no need.

                We were finally home.


So, that’s that! You may or may not agree with having it removed from the story, but I think it’s a nice scene to come back to and visit after all is said and done. While it didn’t make the final cut, I knew it was there, and I’m happy to share it with you. Hope you enjoyed it!

Thanks, and MUCH LOVE!



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